If you want someone to bring you the paper without first tearing it apart to find the sports section – find a dog.
If you want someone to make a fool of himself simply over the joy of seeing you – find a dog.
If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him, and never say it is not quite as good as his mother made it – find a dog.
If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long as and wherever you want – find a dog.
If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn’t give a damn about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies – find a dog.
If you want someone who is content to get up on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores – find a dog.
If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, does not care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually – find a dog.
But on the other hand if you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night and only ever comes home to eat or sleep, and acts as though your entire existence is solely to ensure their happiness – find a cat.