No Ears

A young Army officer was severely wounded in the head by a grenade, but the      only visible, permanent injury was that both of his ears were amputated.

Since his remaining hearing was sufficient, he remained in the Army.

Many years later he eventually rose to the rank of Major General. He was, however, very sensitive about his appearance. One day the  General was interviewing three servicemen who were candidates for his headquarters staff.

The first was a Captain, a tactical helicopter pilot and it was a great interview. At the end of the interview the General asked him “Do you notice anything different about me?” The young officer      answered, “Why yes Sir, I couldn’t help but notice that you have no ears.”  The General was displeased with his lack of tact and threw him out.

The second interview was with a Navy Lieutenant and he was even better.

The General then asked him the same question. “Do you notice anything different about me?” He replied sheepishly, “Well Sir, you have no ears.”

The General threw him out also.

The third interview was with an old Sergeant Major, an infantryman and staff trained NCO. He was      smart, articulate, fit, looked sharp and seemed to know more than the two officers combined.

The General liked this guy and went ahead with the  same question. “Do you notice anything different about me?”

To his surprise the Sergeant Major said, “Yes Sir, you wear contact  lenses.”

The General was very impressed and thought, “What an incredibly observant NCO and he didn’t mention my ears.” He asked the Sergeant Major, “How do you know I wear contacts?”

“Well Sir”, the soldier replied, “It’s pretty hard to wear glasses with no f—ing ears.” 

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